It's Friday... It must be Crackerjack?
It's Friday, it's 08:30... what is it?
No, that was a long time ago!
Pete has taken the girls to school on his way to Uni. The kitchen is sorted (not difficult, it is the size of a postage stamp) and the breakfast stuff is away. The study books are open on the table and I am the other end of the house at the computer
What is it?
~ It's a struggle.
It is in my best interest to learn the language. Church is difficult 'coz I only get 20% of the sermon, worshipping is something else when you have to keep one eye on the overheads as you don't know the songs AND they are in French I needs understanding. To give/recieve encouragements I need competence and clarity with the language... the Spirit is so evident in our church and that is a blessing; God's love transcends language barriers, but I crave a deeper move with God.
~ It's scary.
I've always not liked not knowing what is going on around me in case I am missing out on something! I also don't like it when my name is mentioned followed by laughter and I haven't understood the topic. I especially don't like it when someone says...You don't understand, and I am most hurt when I am excluded from a group because I am different.
~ It's humbling.
We are told to come before our Father as children. Children are dependent on their parents/carers for all things, they come with no expectations, they don't assume, (I'm talking little children!!!!!! I could hear some comments in the camp)they don't judge, they are happy to be near you, they accept what you say without having 'better' ideas, they are vulnerable, they are submissive, they love you for no reason whatsoever, just because. I am reminded that this is where God wants me, I need to rely on Him in all situations. I heard it said that God didn't put me here because I was the best person for the job, but this was where He could best work on me!
~ It's frustrating.
I am like a babbling baby, People at church see my frustrations, my efforts, my failings and want to help; This is the basis for a balanced relationship, helping and needing each other.
~ It's crackers jack!
There is no logic to what we are doing; moving to a country where we don't speak the language, are different culturally and are motivated by faith!!! It is crackers. It is a step of faith, the first step is the hardest there is a lot riding on it, but it is right. Stepping out does not mean stepping away, but stepping in Jesus' footprints.
So, I am going back to those study books and tackle them, I am going to thank God for putting me here and ask for the strength to persevere. I am going to be victorious, because God is in it with me and I have his purposes to fulfil in my life.
Ga 6:9 (TCNT) Let us never tire of doing right, for at the proper season we shall reap our harvest, if we do not grow weary.
I pray that we will each find strength for the daily chores, to do them willingly and as a testimony, that we don't grow weary and that we will be victorious.